The way things should be: Kids

Baby Whisperer: getting started

2012-01-26T18:38:00.001-06:00

With Keaton, I didn't really start the Baby Whisperer method until he was about 2 months old. Before that, I was pretty frustrated. When you first bring them home from the hospital, all they do is sleep. Crying almost always means hunger, so as he grew and start to cry for other reasons, I was conditioned to think it was always hunger. I overfed him, which led to him spitting up, me having over-supply, and it was a vicious cycle. Another danger that can happen is something called "snacking", where they eat so often, that they never really take a full feed, and that becomes a vicious cycle as well.

After reading the book, I realized that every other time he cried, he was tired, NOT hungry. I swaddled him, rocked him, or whatever helped him to settle down at those times, and my life became SO much easier. The goal, by about 1-2 months, is to have baby on a 3 hour routine, where they eat, have some awake time, then sleep. When they wake again, you feed them. If I had to put it in a step by step list, it would be:

1) start feeding baby when he wakes

2) work to keep him awake during the feeding so he gets full (eating often puts them to sleep those first couple of months)

3) work to keep him awake AFTER he eats. At least just change his diaper. The first few weeks, that's all he'll be able to handle. Mine could handle about an hour of awake time at 1 month & about 1.5 hrs at 2 months. That INCLUDES eating time though!

4) as soon as he shows signs of being tired, get him in a position to be able to fall asleep easily. If that's your arms the first couple of months, that's fine (even though BW would say to ALWAYS put them in their bed). If that's swaddling or in a swing, fine. The key is to try to not make one way of falling to sleep (besides on their own in bed) a HABIT past about 6 weeks. Try to vary it up. Also, try not to soothe more than what they need. Turn the swing off or put them down as soon as they fall asleep, and then try to work up to doing it when they're drowsy but not fully asleep yet. You don't want them relying too much on a method of falling asleep that will be difficult for you to keep up as they get older.

I don't think Grant would have been able to do this until just recently, at 1 month old. He was eating every 2 hours no matter what I tried. So I just fed him and waited until he was older. It will come when they're ready. But I noticed the problem when he was staying awake through one cycle and then sleeping the next. So it looked like this- eat, awake (2 hrs), eat, sleep (2 hrs). That isn't a terrible schedule, but I realized 2 hrs of being awake is probably way too long for a baby this age, and he was getting OVER tired. When I started really focusing on that 3rd step and then the 4th, he started sleeping MORE, AND he's now all the sudden going 3 hours between feeds! Finally! Baby Whisperer really does work. :)

For more info:

The book.

The website.

Book Review: Baby Whisperer

2012-01-26T17:56:00.000-06:00

I can't even remember how I discovered it, but Secrets of the Baby Whisperer is, in my opinion, the best baby care book out there. I love its balanced approach, falling somewhere between the extreme attachment parenting crowd and the extreme scheduling, let baby "cry it out" crowd.

The basic premise is to get your baby on a flexible routine of eat, play, sleep, following their cues. She believes in teaching baby to self soothe and learn to fall asleep on his own in his own bed, but with the parents' help. Leaving baby to cry alone breaks trust, so the parent is there along the way to soothe when needed.

There is also an online message board where you can get your questions answered. They will look at your routine & help you tweak it and problem shoot with you to solve sleeping, eating, and other problems.

One warning I got when first starting the book, and one I now agree with, is that her advice on breastfeeding is not entirely accurate. If your baby is gaining well & happy, then go with it, but if there are problems, it would be best to get breastfeeding advice from a certified lactation consultant & not this book.

Introducing Grant!

2012-01-26T16:01:00.001-06:00

Grant Hobbs Davidhizar was born December 21, 2011 at 7:24 am after about 15 hours of labor. I had him naturally (well except for one shot of morphine) which was NOT the plan. Apparently, anesthesiologists in these parts take their merry time in getting to you after you request an epidural (3.5 hrs to be exact). This was after they had sent me home once in active labor. We went back when my water broke at home. It was pretty horrible, something I never want to do again, but of course it was worth it to get this little one.

He was 7 lbs, 7 oz., exact same as Keaton, and 20.25 in. long. He came out pink & screaming & hungry. He nursed great right away. So far I can tell he is stronger & more alert than Keaton was. Physical recovery for me was much better, but I had insomnia & some pretty serious baby blues the first couple of weeks.

Tot School, weeks 5-8 & some Fall Fun!

2011-11-16T23:15:00.000-06:00

I didn't get many pictures of Tot School this month, and I just don't have the time to update every week, so I'm going to try to do an update at the end of each unit.

What is Tot School?

What curriculum do I use?

Bible: This unit was on God creating the animals: fish & birds, zoo animals, farm animals, and pets. The verse was 1 Thess. 2:13 which Keaton knows now, but it's hard to get him to sing it by himself. :) The songs we did were "If you're happy & you know it" (K's favorite), "Praise Him", "Jesus Loves me", & "Jesus Loves the Little Children." Here is the Bible I use.

Some activities we did:

Cut out & glued pictures of birds from Dad's Ducks Unlimited magazines & stuck fish stickers underneath in the "ocean". We also stuck stickers of zoo animals (which I found in the $ section of Wal-Mart), and drew a "zoo". I will try to post our finished Creation Book after we finish it this week.
We played these computer games: farm animal sounds, guess the animal sound, pet care game, and create an ocean.
Played with our farm sensory bin.
went to the zoo

Colors:

We colored a green balloon to introduce green.
sorted color flashcards by color- red, blue, & yellow.
colored with sidewalk chalk,
and are planning on doing THIS activity Friday, which I'm excited about!

Shapes: We worked on our square books some more, learned about the heart shape, and introduced rectangle.

Books of the Week: These went along with our animal theme, except the leaf one, but I figured since it's fall.... We actually went on a leaf hunt outside one day, which was a fun adventure.

The Beak Book
Going on a Leaf Hunt
The Big Red Barn
and a book about pets that I had from the $ aisle. :)

Fine motor activities:

played with play dough
colored vertically on the window with these window markers. (coloring on a vertical surface is supposed to help with motor control.)
push pasta through holes in an empty cereal box
tear paper. Keaton looked at me incredulously when I suggested this! I explained to him that we only tear trash paper. (He has never torn books or anything else on purpose, so this was new for him.) He put it nicely into a box for me as he tore it, so we could throw it away. Love that kid! :)

Large motor activities:

blew up & hit a balloon around- K loved this!
rolled his big beach ball pack & forth
climbed through his play tunnel & into his tent. He really wanted me to climb through too, but honestly think my pregnant belly would've gotten me stuck in there somehow!

And onto the fun stuff.... Dad was working allll weekend, so I decided not to stay home! Friday we went to the local Children's Museum.

Saturday, we went to the pumpkin patch...

couldn't get him to sit still...

He wanted to find a "little punkin", but they didn't have any, so huge-'ol pregnant mom had to carry a big one back to the tractor!

a little too heavy...

playing with the water spout...

Petting the goats. We got the feed them some corn, and he was laughing so hard at the goats' tickling his hand with their tongue!

with Mommy on the hayride. He was scared of it at first, but after we got off, all he could talk about was the tractor.

LOVE this one. He looks so tough!

Then Sunday, we went to church... (all dressed up beside our pumpkin)

After church & naptime, we went to a fall festival @ a local church. It was okay, but they didn't really have things for his age to do. He did have fun in the bouncy house & getting a few pieces of candy.

2 More Sensory Bins

2011-10-29T13:16:00.001-06:00

This unit, we're studying how God made the animals. The ABCJLM curriculum has it set up to study fish & birds for week 5, zoo animals week 6, farm animals week 7, & pets week 8. I decided that a farm sensory bin would be easiest.

K took one look at it and immediately decided he needed a barn, haha. So I drew one with sidewalk chalk!

What's in the box?

some birdseed I had a huge bag of
plastic shovel
farmer toy
dollar store tractor
These farm animals
a couple of rubber duckies from our bath toys

At his kids' program, he's learning about the color orange, so I made an orange bin. (They switch colors every 4 weeks.)

What's in the bin?

orange colored rice
wooden pumpkins from Hobby Lobby
small plastic leaves from Hobby Lobby
gourds & pumpkins from $ store
a whale bath toy for pouring
Zoe from Sesame Street
orange pipe cleaners
foam letters from THIS set
I'm going to add some fall leaves next week.

Tot School, Week 2

2011-10-28T21:36:00.001-06:00

This week:

Book of the week: Terrific Trains This is not one of the books from the ABC Jesus Loves Me curriculum, but it is excellent. The rhymes are captivating while actually teaching something about trains. I put the rest of the books in the series on K's Christmas list. K plays with trains pretty much every spare minute, so I didn't really need to add any of that in, but we did make a "shape train." I don't have pics, because he wanted to give it to Nana. You cut out circles for wheels, a rectangle for the train body, a square for the top, and a triangle for the smoke stack; then they glue the shapes together to make a train.
Bible story: God made the plants. Here is the craft we did: You use the bottom of a Coke bottle dipped in paint for the petals & the cap for the center. He didn't really want me to guide his hands to put this together the right way. Next time, I think I'll let him explore the paint on his own before attempting the project. At this age, it's best to just let it go if they don't want to do it "the right way." Connecting frustration with school is not something you want, especially this early!

Verse, Song, & Rhyme: Genesis 1:1, The B-I-B-L-E, and a train song
Fine motor activity: sorting pom poms by color. He got this concept surprisingly fast. I only had to explain it to him once. I got the sorting tray @ the $ store!

We also colored a blue truck, practiced horizontal & vertical lines with window markers. (We have a ways to go on that concept.), and learned about the # 1.

Tot School, Week 3

2011-10-28T21:28:00.002-06:00

This week:

I am using the ABC Jesus Loves Me 2 yr old curriculum.

Book of the week: One Fish, Two Fish, Red Fish, Blue Fish

Here is our craft for our book theme this week. Gluing on the tissue paper squares was fun for him, and super easy for me. I also put some nomenclature cards of ocean animals in our mini pocket chart for him to play with and learn the names of.

Bible story: God made the sun, moon, & stars.

Here is the craft we did: I improvised a bit & used stickers for the stars. He loved sticking those on.

Verse, Song, & Rhyme: Genesis 1:1, Praise God, Twinkle Twinkle Little Star

Fine motor activity: put baby rings onto paper towel holder. I wasn't sure he would like this activity, but he actually played with it all week!

Gross motor activity: We played red light, green light with a little homemade sign I created. He had so much fun running around saying "stop" & "go", but he didn't get the concept at all. lol
We also made circles out of play-doh, worked on our "Circle Books", colored a yellow bus, and learned about # 2. His manners skill this week was saying, "thank you".

Just for fun... here's a pic of him in his costume for the Fall Costume Parade at his children's program. Such an adorable monkey!

Tot School: Week 1

2011-10-04T21:12:00.000-06:00

I admit I was a bit hesitant at starting something, anything so structured (as little structure as it is) @ age 2, but it went really well this week! I just had a sense that K was bored a lot & that we needed a bit more direction in activities we were doing. It helps me at least, because now I feel like there is more purpose than just "playing with mommy" (although that is super important). If nothing else, it motivates ME.

This week:

Book of the week: Llama llama, Red Pajama. Honestly, the first time I read it I thought it was dumb & that it would instill fears into my child that weren't there, but K loved it! He wanted me to read it again & again (which is what you do with this curriculum!) We wore our pajamas all day on Friday "just like Llama llama." (that is, until he threw up all over them & me, but that's another story.)
Bible story: God made light & darkness (day & night) and water & sky. Today was our first day of Week 2, and I said, "OK, let's go read our story." and K goes, "and see what God made?" He remembers! I couldn't believe he remembered what we were studying! So exciting, and he remembered what we learned from week one. Here's our craft: He had lots of fun with the blue finger paint.

Verse, Song, & Rhyme: Genesis 1:1, This Little Light of Mine, Pat a Cake: I feel silly singing these. First of all, I'm terrible @ music, and it just feels weird singing them to one kid who's not even singing with you. That is, until the end of the week. He LOVED this time! We had done these songs before, but he just thought it was the best, and lit up with all grins. By the end of the week, he was helping me out with the motions and could say some of the verse himself!
Shape: circle I had a "brilliant" idea for this one, to make circles in shaving cream with circle blocks. It did not work at all. LOL First of all, he wasn't feeling well (this was Fri), and he doesn't really like getting messy with gooey stuff. The shapes did not turn out at all. Good thing circle is the one shape he knows! :) Oh well, you learn by trial & error.
We also colored a red wagon, ate red popsicles, played with water & sponges & sidewalk chalk (outside- which he loved).

He's learning yellow at his kids' program, so I made a yellow sensory bin for this month.

My Tot School

2011-10-04T20:29:00.003-06:00

Now that K is ready to learn in a more concrete way, the teacher in me is sneaking out! We haven't decided on homeschooling long term yet, so I decided I'd better get it in while I can! I got the idea for Tot School here. Then I found a great free curriculum online for 2-4 yr olds. It's called ABC Jesus Loves Me. I LOVE it, because it...

goes really slowly
reviews a ton
has lots of hands on activities
can be completed in only 3 days per week.
included things I already wanted to work on with K.

You go over the same Bible story each day for a week, same nursery rhyme, & same Bible song. The verses are set to music, and it's only one verse per month. I revised the shapes section a bit, and am taking the first half of the year to intro them (a shape every 2 wks), and the rest of the year to do fun activities to review them.K already knows his colors, but we're going to do projects & activities with them too, mostly coloring. There is also a "book of the week" that I read to him @ bed time each night. If my library doesn't have the book in the curriculum, I just substitute a neat one that I already have. The other thing I really like is that it teaches a self care or manners concept each week as well: dressing, saying please & thank-you, sitting quietly, introducing yourself, etc.

This is how I incorporate it into our schedule:

In the morning (& throughout the day) we work on the manners or self care concept.
Before nap, we have "Bible time": go over Bible story, song, verse, & nursery rhyme.
During our set aside "tot time" in the afternoons, we pick 2 activities from the curriculum to do: Tue: Bible craft & gross motor activity, Wed: color, counting, & fine motor activity, & Fri: shape & book of the week activities
Then at bedtime I read him the Book of the Week.

I'll try to post about our first week tomorrow.

A 2-year-old's Day

2011-08-26T17:12:00.000-06:00

Here's what my 2-yr-old's day looks like...

5:30 AM- wake up & scream for milk. Goes back to sleep (after he gets his milk).

7:00 AM- Wake up for real- diaper, clothes, potty

free play

8/8:30-breakfast

9:00-outside time w/Mom or running errands

10:00- Room Time (this is when he plays alone in his room. I got the idea from Toddler Wise, and it's helped him learn to entertain himself for a little while, as he used to need me to constantly entertain him. I think it'll be useful when baby comes.)

10:30- TV time

11:30- lunch

12:00- help Mommy w/ chores- he can help me unload DW, switch out laundry, or sweep

12:30- NAP

2:30- up

3/3:30- snack, then TOT time (this is play time w/ Mom that is semi-educational)

4:00- free play

4:30- structured play (try to keep him busy while I cook dinner- magnets, coloring, play-doh, etc.)

5:30- dinner

6:00- play w/ Daddy

7:30- bedtime routine

We also do MOPS every other Monday, play dates once a month, & he goes to kid's day program on Thursdays.

Do you have a 2 yr old schedule you can share?

2011-05-29T14:14:00.001-06:00

I put these up, so I could show some online friends Keaton's bug bites. Apparently, he is really sensitive to mosquitoes. I have no experience with this or any type of allergy, really. I have a pretty high resistance to any kind of bite, perhaps from growing up in the country. He got two on his face not long after this, and his whole face was swollen up. If you have any ideas on why/what/what to do, please share.

Keaton @ 18 months

2011-04-14T11:20:00.005-06:00

Keaton @ 18 months: He is turning from an explorer into an experimenter & gets frustrated sometimes when his experiments fail. :) He still likes to cuddle, & still likes Mom better than Dad (although I'm sure that will change someday soon.) He's talking & wants to know the word to everything. Being outside, water, & books are still his favorite things. He's eating better, & sleeping worse since 12 months. I love how he cleans up spills before I can get to them, pushes my face into his to give me a kiss, and points to the sky, saying, "God" when we read his Bible @ night. He is our pride & joy! But the boy needs a sibling! Please pray he gets one soon. ;)

Book Review: Raising Godly Tomatoes

2011-03-16T13:28:00.001-06:00

Here's the review I wrote for Amazon:

I really like her advice for the most part, especially the concept of training early (as soon as the understand "no") & consistently.

I think the "separation from the world" goes a little overboard, as I would like for my children to have other friends, and even non-Christian friends if they were supervised or I already trusted them completely.

I also take a different approach to temper tantrums & pouting. I think ignoring IS effective IF you ignore completely & are consistent. When DB was little, he threw a fit over a toy he wanted at the store. My grandmother was with him & she just burst out laughing in front of everyone. He was so shocked & embarrassed, he never did it again! :) (not the reaction he was going for! :) )

But most of her advice is really sound & based on experience that has worked! She is more balanced than the Pearls, Roy Lessin, or Ezzo that's for sure! More loving, and more age-appropriate. Most importantly, she is much less legalistic & exclusive (as in, "my way's the only right way") than they are! I am grateful for this.

As for spanking, most people are against it bc they don't do it correctly or have seen people use it incorrectly. If you start early, like she suggests & are consistent, you will hardly ever HAVE to spank. THIS is the goal. As for people quoting the Bible as being against spanking, you need to take another look. Nowhere does Jesus say not to spank. The shepherd's rod WAS used to guide, but this verse suggests it should also be used to punish.
"Do not withhold discipline from a child; if you punish him with the rod, he will not die." Prov 23:13 PUNISH, not GUIDE.
Here are others to read if you're serious about figuring this out...
Prov 3:12, 12:1, 13:24, 19:18, 22:15, 29:17, Hebrews 12:5-11, Rev 3:19

Thanks for the website & book!

PS- Notice how all the negative reviews are blocked together. There is an anti-spanking website that gives links to Amazon on all the books they don't like & tells them to leave bad comments. Talk about herd mentality! Most have not even read the book.

Her book

Her website

6-12 Month Must Haves!

2011-03-15T13:51:00.003-06:00

This is a little late, but here are my recommendations of really cool baby products for 6-12 monthers.

Jogging Stroller! Used every day around our house.
Boon feeding spoon. These are great when starting solids & on the go. Just empty the jar of baby food into the spoon and squeeze some out for each bite.
Bumkins Bibs. The reason I like these is they are machine washable! (I line dry them.) They are also water resistant for all that messy baby food. (For a drooling baby, the absorbent bibs are best.) They have held up great & are so cute!
Boon bath spout cover. I realize this is one of the more expensive ones, but I love it. You can fill a space with baby wash & push a button to dispense it. The bottom part is soft for when little heads bump it. And the best part (& a feature others didn't have) was that it has an opening up top to pull the shower head on, so we can still use the shower sprayer, w/o taking the entire thing off. This is what I was looking for.
Halo Sleep Sacks. These are awesome for winter! Blankets aren't safe until baby can go from lying down to sitting up on his own, so use these until then!
Playtex sippy cup. A friend bought these for K and told me they were the best. I didn't believe her, but NOW I do! I started with the soft spout cups, but eventually all of those started leaking. Or he would push the soft plastic part into the cup & spill the water all over himself! These have never leaked, & lids have never come off. They really are the BEST!
Taggie blankie. A friend had one made for him out of Dick & Jane fabric. It took him awhile to become attached, but the parenting books say it's good for them to become attached to something they can control to make sleep training easier. (It's easy for them to grab a blankie.) DS always plays with the tags on his while falling asleep. Here's an example, but this isn't the one he has. (Tip: buy 2! in case they lose one.)
Toys: ones he likes the most are Vtech electronic toys (they last), board books, keys we no longer use, and things he can chew on.

Keaton laughing @ WipeOut

2011-03-01T20:41:00.000-06:00

Keaton @ 12 months.

2011-01-17T21:41:00.000-06:00

I realized I haven't posted pics of Keaton in forever! Here are some more up to date photos. He's 16 months now, but these are mostly around 12 months. I know, I'm behind!

Things I love about Keaton right now: he likes to cuddle now (finally!), he signs potty & actually GOES sometimes!, he is starting to talk (but refuses to say Mama even though he knows how ;) ), his running & giggling when we play chase, his helping Mama "clean", & the fact that he can sit & watch an entire TV show w/o moving (never seen f/ a boy this age, but he's loved TV since BIRTH).

The first few were taken by my friend, Lisa Domine. I will add more soon hopefully!

Can a 13 mo old love Jesus?

2010-10-05T18:56:00.001-06:00

First off, know that I am not the type to exaggerate when it comes to things like this. I was shocked when I figured out what was going on.

I was reading to my 13 mo old from the Children's Bible, the kind that have paraphrased stories from the Bible for kids. I usually read one per night to him. I am still in the Old Testament, and he did not want to stay on the pages like he usually does. He wanted to turn back to the front cover. After a few attempts of struggling with him, I decided it wasn't a big deal to just let him look at the cover. On the cover is a picture of many of the characters from the book. He looked at it for a moment, and then pointed to one man sitting down front in the middle with a child on his lap. I didn't realize who it was, so I said, "Dada? You see a Daddy?" "Oh, that's Jesus! You see Jesus?"

Then he did the sign for "I love you", a sign he knows well. I was shocked! "Yeah! You love Jesus!" I tried to teach him the sign for Jesus, and he tried several times to do it, but it's a hard one. Every time I would take his hands & do it for him, he would just light up and smile really big. Then I sang "Jesus loves me", doing the signs with him as we sang. When I finished, he just looked up at me with the biggest grin. We also turned to the section with the stories about Jesus, and he just looked & looked at his picture.

After thinking about what happened, I realized something. Since he was born, I have always told him, "Jesus loves you," each night before I put him to bed. Usually I just whisper it, so I didn't even think he heard me. But maybe that had something to do with it. He doesn't listen to kid's praise songs or watch videos of it or anything like that, so that's the only place I could think of that he got it from.

I just thought I would share & that it might encourage someone else. God moves in the lives of those around us even when we're not trying to force or orchestrate anything on purpose. :)

Review of the Pearls

2010-06-08T13:36:00.001-06:00

Michael & Debbie Pearl have a website, family ministry, and have written several books, including To Train up a Child and No Greater Joy. Here is the review I left on Amazon about it, for what it's worth if anyone is looking into these books or site.

"I hate to focus just on the things that I don't agree with, but I think if you are going to hold yourself up as an expert and write books for others to follow, you need to be above reproach. I do not disagree in general or even with perhaps most of their teachings, but these... are you KIDDING ME?? (direct quotes from their website)

"If a child cries out in loneliness and is rewarded by being picked up, you have trained him to repeat the crying any time he wants to control the adults in his life." (talking about babies!)

"If an infant sticks his finger in his eye, the pain will discourage him from repeating that on himself, but he may try it on you. That is unless you should make his unwelcomed advances unpleasant for him. The first time an infant pulls your hair, if you pull his, he will never be a hair-puller." (Actually, my 5 mo old still pulls his own hair & scratches himself. That means he does not yet have the ability to relate the act to the consequence. He is learning but is not there yet, so I will wait until I know he is before "training" him. There is plenty of time to teach a child not to do things when he is old enough to do them ON PURPOSE, but until he's ready, WEAR YOUR HAIR UP!)

"Parents do not start trying to train their children until they are convinced they can receive instruction, by which time children are already confirmed in carnality, addicted to the pleasures of hedonism." (so train them before they are able to understand it? makes sense.)

(talking about a 10-mo old)"Just as you are about to feed her, tell her to stop crying and you will feed her. You do this when you are sitting in front of her, preparing to feed her. When she stops, brag on her for not crying and then reward her with food. By this you are conditioning her to the concept that she gets fed when she is not crying." (so every time she isn't crying, she will get fed? you are going to end up with one fat baby! Since 10-mo-olds can't talk, how else should she communicate she is hungry?)

(again, 10-mo-old)"Wait one minute, and then tell the baby to stop crying. If he doesn't, again swat him on his bare legs." (spanking a 10-mo-old for crying is never ok.)

[question] "Is it right to spank a 7-month-old for crying when put down for bed? I grew up with just ignoring the child, thus training them that they will not get their way. My husband wants it to stop all together."... [answer:] "Daddy needs to be in charge, and you need to learn to trust and honor his judgment." (um, NO, not when the husband wants to abuse the children! We are to honor them, but not when they are going against what God wants.) [Micheal's answer to the same question:] "As a last resort, you may have to prove the power of your word by enforcing it with one or two stinging licks (applied with a small flexible switch) to the child's leg." (a 7-mo-old??)

"At less than three-months-old this little girl had discovered the power of emotional manipulation. For several days she refined her technique of control. She discovered how to use the mother's guilt against her....This wise mother decided to retrain her three-month-old baby. She laid her down knowing she would cry. The mother calmly ignored the crying. When Suzzie stopped crying and became cheerful, Mother picked her up and played with her. When Suzzie was placed in the crib and again cried, the mother again ignored her until she became cheerful." (squashing any attempt at communication- & at 3-mo- crying is all they have. sad.)

These speak for themselves, don't they?"

Debbie has written a book, Created to be his Helpmeet. Great concept. Not a great book. Here is a good review of it:

http://spunkyhomeschool.blogspot.com/2005/07/created-to-be-his-help-meet-part-1.html

& lots of pics!

2010-02-12T23:09:00.013-06:00

Videos

2010-02-12T23:01:00.006-06:00

Keaton is here!

2009-09-19T17:19:00.010-06:00

Keaton John Davidhizar was born Sept. 5 at 10:37 am. 7 lbs, 7 oz., 21 in.

Pictures:
1) Last pic of me pregnant
2) birth
3-7) pics in hospital
8) coming home
9) 2 weeks old- his hands are blue bc I was trying to get his handprint for his babybook. lol.

We are both doing well. Thanks for praying, everyone. :)

Baby's Room

2009-08-12T10:43:00.013-06:00

OK, so the room is almost ready. The only thing needed is crib sheets which my mom is making out of the Dick & Jane fabric. Our space is really limited (This room is office & baby room), and we're not allowed to paint the walls or anything. Just thought I would share!

the crib (craig's list)

The changing table (also craig's list- got it for half of retail, still in the box, never been used)

This is the quilt my mom made.

Stroller, diaper bag

I am giving cloth diapers a try. (Did the math and will save minimum $1000 in 2 years going with cloth.)

The closet. (the bag at the bottom was FILLED with hand-me-downs from my cousin, so I didn't have to buy hardly anything.) :)

Parenting Class

2008-02-23T22:00:00.007-06:00

I called my friend who works for CPS to see if I could volunteer to teach parenting classes, as I have had a passion for that for the last few years. She told me they contract all of their classes out, and I still need to follow up on finding somewhere to volunteer. And yet, I don't have any children. :) So, what I'm wondering is: should I let that stop me? I honestly think I know more about it than many parents I see. But I am sure it must be much harder than it looks, and no one has all the answers. Here is my parenting philosophy. Let me know if you think I should pursue this idea. :)

Spank them when they're 3! If you don't spank your child when they're 3, it will be too late. Every time I see a kid that looks too far gone, I think to myself, his parents should have spanked him when he was 3. :)

Always expect respect and obedience from your children. Children are so different, and what we expect of them should vary according to their ability, personality, and age, but past 24 months, these 2 things are non-negotiable.

Let your kids go!! I learned this from my grandfather-in-law, a very wise man. When your children move out of the house, move them out of your control, your radar, your un-solicited advice, your bank account, etc. This is for sure one that is easier said than done.

Never discipline your kids only for getting on your nerves. This teaches them that parents are allowed to be selfish just because they are parents. Leave the room, and cool off. Another one easier said than done. :)

Never argue about parenting decisions in front of the kids, question your spouse's decision in front of the kids, or criticise your spouse in front of the kids. (like on John & Kate plus 8- yikes)

Learn your child's love language, and speak it. http://www.fivelovelanguages.com/books_familyparenting.html#children

Don't have kids if you can't take care of them, love them, or discipline them. :)

Cool Family Links

2008-02-13T18:27:00.003-06:00

Here are some links to some websites of really cool families. :)

John & Kate Gosselin (have twins and sextuplets): http://www.sixgosselins.com/
Duggars- 17 children under the age of 20!: http://www.duggarfamily.com/
The Jeub Family- http://jeubfamily.com/
Dilly Sextuplets- http://www.quintland.com/dilley/
McCaugheys- Septuplets- http://www.lhj.com/lhj/category.jhtml?categoryid=/templatedata/lhj/category/data/Celebrities_McCaugheySeptuplets.xml

Road Trip Tips

2007-08-05T17:53:00.002-06:00

If you're taking an end of summer road trip with your children the next couple of weeks, or if you just want to read a really good article, read this. It is so good.

A Father’s Summer Trip Road Rules

These are the road rules your Father has for you as I look in the rearview mirror this glorious summer day. Rules for Good and not for Evil as we travel in this mighty suburban that handles so well, but also drinks gas like a football team at a drinking fountain. Listen to what I say, for you are my children and I am your Father.
When you sit next to your brother or sister, do not put your hands all over them as the heathens do. No, I say, do not. Put your hands in front of you; not to the left or to the right, but in your lap for this pleases me. Likewise with your feet. Keep them to yourself for they are yours and yours to be felt only by you.
Dear children, do not tease each other while we journey together. Sons, do not pull your sister’s pigtails, ponytail—whatever animal she may resemble at the time. No, this I say, do not. Do not make fun of Hanna Montana and especially Barbie. For they are dear to her and so are dear to me. This I will not tolerate for she screams the way she does when she discovers a spider in the shower. This, and high gas prices, are an abomination to me.
Daughter, do not tease your brothers because their hair cuts are six months behind the fashion curve. And do not be haughty about your superior understanding of fashion, for this too breaks my heart. Do not say, “I know clothing better than you. My pinks, they never clash,” for this is an arrogant spirit my dear daughter.
How I long to give you sweets and sugared waters while we travel but I have seen what you do with them and it breaks my heart. Though you eat part of your marshmallow or Gummy Bear or other sugary delight—you also wear part of them. I find them in your hair. In my hair. I find them on the bottom of your shoes and on this manly steering wheel. I find them under the hood.
And when I buy you hamburgers from the swift drive-thru window, please do not tell me you won’t eat them because they have buried deep in the bun one measly pickle. How this burns my charbroiled bacon! Do not sit there, full of sorrow. Do not shriek! No, this I tell you. Be grateful for what you have. Rejoice! Remove the offense and place it in the wrapper and then—Very Important!—lick your tiny and nimble fingers. Do not wipe them on the seat for they are not treated to fight stains!
When you are sickened by the bumps and turns in the road, do not withhold this information from me. For I am a good and patient Father and I want to share in your afflictions. I will give you a seat that is preferred above all other seats. I will give you thy Passenger Seat to the right of the Father, a highly coveted seat indeed. I will put you next to me and I will run the air conditioner on your pale and sweaty face and I will pat your little head. I will pray for you and kiss your sweet forehead. I will tell you stories of long ago when I too fell ill to the Menace of the Road and how I conquered it and this will give you faith my dear children.
I will show compassion on thee for another reason: I don’t want to clean up after you. Oh, how you have done this to me in the past! I have caught your sickness in a heavy duty Zip-Lock bag too many times and I cannot look upon it again. The sound and smell sends our entire tribe running to the four corners of our suburban for which we still make payments!
I want to know how you feel so I can pull over right away and buy you 7-Up. And if not 7-Up, Sprite. And if not Sprite, Fresca. And if Fresca cannot be found I will drive day and night till I find you anything, even TAB, for this is how deep my love is for you.
Yet in spite of all this, when I look in the rear view mirror, I see your dear faces and my heart is so glad. You are flesh of my flesh, breath of my breath. You inspire me to greatness, though I feel at times mediocre. I am sometimes an impatient father, and I know this exasperates you and earns your displeasure. How I fail you. Yet you are so quick to forgive me as God is quick to forgive me, too. My heart is grateful. I hope and pray that my deep and abiding love for you is what you’ll remember when you think about these trips when you are grown, and when you thumb through photos of them with your kids.
I ponder these things as I look in the rearview mirror. Then I see that your eyes are shut. My eyes water. I pray for you as we forge ahead to destinations known and unknown, around corners of hope, grace, faith, and forgiveness. I love your kind and familiar faces, how your heads rest upon one another’s shoulders, and this rare stretch of highway silence hum.

by Paul Coughlin
http://www.christianniceguy.com/

Children's Church- to send or not to send?

2007-06-25T22:59:00.002-06:00

There are many who think that sending children to Sunday School is somehow harmful to them, and that they should stay in the pew with their parents at all times. This is a growing idea that many get from books like Parenting from the Pew by Robbie Castleman. (see comment below)

Below are some reasons why I think Sunday School can be very beneficial. First off, let me say that I respect a parent's right to do what they want with their own children. No church should tell parents what they should do in this area. Parents should discuss and decide for themselves what to do in this area.

Having children in the service is a distraction. I don't care how well-behaved and well-trained your children are, there are times when they will be a distraction, especially to you as parents, but also to those around you. Babies cry; 2-yr-olds squirm. Even if you do train them, they can be a big distraction during that training period. Does your right to parent how you want trump others' right to be able to focus on the sermon?

Along those lines, you, as a parent will not get as much out of the service if your children are with you. Parents need time to spend with God without distraction. With children, these times are already rare. You must covet and value the time you do have.

Children need lessons on their own level. Yes, your children will get more out of an adult sermon than you think they would, but is it as much as they would have gotten out of a lesson that is tailor-made for their understand and learning style? Children, especially boys, learn better from hands-on activities and visual stimulation. Many site the excuse that their church doesn't have a good and challenging curriculum. They find them coloring a page of Noah and the ark for the hundredth time. If your church doesn't have a challenging curriculum, find one that does!! They may be rare, but they do exist. See: http://www.childrendesiringgod.org/

Children need to start practicing fellowship now. They need to realize that the church is bigger than just their own family. Through associating with children their own age, they can learn to minister to others, to pray for them and be prayed for, and just to learn from each other. Many families who keep their children in the service are homeschooling families. I'm all for homeschooling, but these families need to look for opportunities for their children to be around others their own age. No, other children are not perfect, but could it be possible that one of them could influence your child in a positive way? (gasp!) Maybe? Also, your "perfect" little ones need to be out there being useful and influencing others for the better as well. Nothing magical happens at age 18 that makes your child somehow now able to minister to weaker people. This can happen at age 3! Why deny them that awesome opportunity?

Since the church is bigger than just your family, you need to learn how to trust others with your children. I think this is a big issue for homeschooling parents. Children need to know that there are adults who care about them and God, other than just their parents. The idea that "Our family does it the right way, and hardly anyone else does," is a dangerous and infectious thing to teach your children. By not trusting other adults with your children, are you teaching them this? They might even be able to teach them something you haven't yet. (gasp! again) It also makes babies and toddlers more secure if they are left with other adults every once in awhile. (There is balance in this. I think if they are left on a daily basis, this causes insecurity, but if it never happens, that can also cause insecurity.)

It builds their immune system. Many complain that their children come home sick every time they are in the nursery. Usually, this will only be temporary. This is a crucial age, where if they are exposed to others' germs, they can build good immunity toward those bugs and just in general for later in life. Have patience with this, because it really is good for your kids if you can wait out the initial "sick" period.

Keep them busy- Pre-K ers, 3-5 year olds

2007-05-05T22:12:00.001-06:00

I will try to write about some ideas to keep little hands busy while you need to be busy with something else. Here is one link that has a lot of great ideas!
http://www.preschoolersandpeace.com/wst_page2.html

Toys they love:

Your old clothes to dress up in: old or cheap jewelry, Dad's old ties, shoes, scarves, sunglasses, old cell phones or cameras.

Office toys- an old mouse, keyboard, spiral notebooks w/ pencils, calculator

Books on tape

Computer learning games. (Computers are not evil for kids- this will build their mouse & keyboard skills which THEY WILL need in their future jobs.)

Magnets- you can make your own if you want.

Wading pool (or a hose) w/ sponges, buckets, toy boats, water guns (toy guns are not evil either- I promise)- when you live in south TX, this water play is a must!

A way to keep old toys exciting is to rotate them about every 6 months- put 1/3 of the toys in the attic or a closet. When you pull them out in 6 months or a year, the kids will be so excited. It's like getting new toys! But remember when you pull them out, to put up another 1/3 of toys, so you can do it again!

Other activities

Squirt shaving cream on a placemat and let them "draw" in it.
Limited TV time. (I will write about this in a future post- with a review of different shows.)

Beads, cheerios, and pasta (you can color the pasta with food coloring) to string to make necklaces or bracelets.

Give them a tape recorder to sing or talk into (for your motor-mouths, lol) or to interview others.

A dishpan with rice in it and measuring cups and funnels.

Use a tweezer to pick up small beads- this builds fine motor skills, or use tongs for different muscles. Move the objects from one container to another.

That is all I can think of right now. I will try to write about 1-2 yr olds soon!

PS- My mother asked me the other day, "What is the one thing I wish I had done differently as a mother? Do you remember?" "Yes, Mom, you've only mentioned it the last 5 times we've talked. :) You wished you had spent more time playing with us and less time on the house." If you are a task-person (as I am), be careful to not have the same regrets with your kids.

Keep them busy: infants

2007-04-04T19:18:00.002-06:00

Ideas for babies 4-12 months:

Things get tricky at 4 months, when babies begin to want to be mobile and interact with their environment.
Here are some "toys" I have found that work:
plastic lids (the rim is just right for teething and these are easy to hold.)
Ice trays, small plastic plates, a sippy cup with a little water in it, foam blocks (also good for teething), board books, towells with rough patterns, old cell phones or tv remotes (how often have they reached for yours? they love buttons!), a plastic box with smaller toys in it to shake, small squishy balls.

Activities (many need supervision):

A toy they really love, but you have to watch them the whole time, is a bag that crinkles- thicker than a ziploc, so they can't bite through it, but one that they can't open. Play-doh now comes in these shiny ziploc bags, and "my" babies LOVE them. I just have to watch them the whole time.
I also give them an old magazine to crinkle up. The trick is, put a pacifier in their mouth first! As you know, everything goes straight to the mouth at this age, but some babies will be able to keep a pacifier in while playing with paper. Of course, I am watching them the whole time, but it's worth it, bc this toy keeps them busy for so long.
Tie some of DH's neck ties on the fan blades & turn it on low. They can lie on your bed, & it will entertain them forever! (can start this before 4 mo.)
Put them in the sink with some water (or bathtub if they can sit up on their own.) Let them splash around.
Sit them on your lap with a toy while you work on the computer.
If desperate, strap them in their car seat and put on Baby Einstein. It really does work better than other shows, but won't work for every baby.
Make patterns that they can copy with clapping, slapping the ground or coffee table, or other simple gestures. Start very simple. This is the beginning stage of teaching baby sign language also.
Dance to music- "my" babies started dancing between 8-10 months.
Copy the noises they make- they have done studies on this, and it's supposed to be really good. It teaches them they can affect other people and communicate.

That's all I can think of now, other than the things you always hear about.
I will try to post some ideas to keep different age groups happy when you need to be busy with something else.

The Kids I keep

2007-02-09T12:19:00.000-06:00

Top- the 12-month-old- amost walking!

Second- the 2-yr-old- almost talking

Third- the 2.5-yr-old- nothing she can't do. :)

Fourth- the 7-month-old- just started crawling

Fifth- the 5-yr-old- TC for everything ("too cool")

Bottom- the 8-month-old- pulling up on things!